Televangelists stole my mother's faith

I love my mother. She also gets under my skin.

Religion has always been one of the biggest bones of contention between us. Despite having been graced with many extraordinary pastors and church communities over the years, she always preferred televangelists. I have no respect for them.

My mother likes them because they do not tell her to get out of her comfort zone to serve Christ. Their demands are simple. All you have to do is to send them money and they will spread the word of God for you. No one is going to push you to give your time, energy, and heart to minister to the broken and lost. No need to lend your shoulder to others or accept theirs when life deals a bad hand. No fuss. No mess.

Over the years, I encouraged her to turn off the television and truly join the body of Christ in the real world. Sometimes the nudge was gentle. Sometimes it wasn't. Sometimes I told her of their materialism and departure from the teachings of Jesus. Sometimes I just rolled my eyes and let my thoughts drift to more enjoyable pursuits while she sang their praises.

Holidays and birthdays usually meant at least book or video plugged by the clown princes and princesses of public piety for profit. At first, I read or watched the offering out of respect and a desire to better understand why this crap appealed to her. It was a waste of time and energy, not to mention a big freaking irritant. Now I just donate them in their original packaging to their first charitable resale shop I can find.

The spiritual junk food was not a problem for my mother until cancer entered our lives. My son developed neuroendocrine cancer five years ago. Because the tumors do not show up on scans until they get large enough to spread, you tread water if you are lucky and drown if you are not. It does not lend itself to the false hopes and promises sold by televangelists.

As my son got sicker over the years, my mother became more desperate to do something. When the televangelists promised a miracle or blessings would come her way if she had enough faith to give them money, she wrote big checks and put my son on their prayer lists. No matter how much she gave, my son did not wake up one morning without cancer. His surgeries and chemotherapy never brought anything more than a brief respite from symptoms. And I do not sugarcoat reality.

My son has a private blog where he posts updates on his condition and vividly describes his experiences with cancer and his reactions to being sick. The blog simplifies keeping family and friends posted without having to tell the same damn story over and over again. It draws and quarters denial, my mother's preferred emotional defense mechanism.

Over the last few months, my mother has experienced a deepening crisis of faith. It has become clearer and clearer that all the promises of health for her grandson made by the money changers on the "christian" networks were false. If you gave them money and believed their promises, God was supposed to hop into action. She gave lots of money and believed, but my son's cancer is still winning every battle and her faith is withering away.

The National Association of Evangelicals has proposed new ethical guidelines for pastors and other religious leaders.

The new code is a good starting point for ministers in a profession that can be individualistic and entrepreneurial, said David P. Gushee, a professor of Christian ethics and director of the Center for Theology and Public Life at Mercer University. 

“In some ways it’s the Wild West out there in terms of the context of preparation for ministry in the evangelical world,” he said. “Any effort to raise the moral bar and establish a minimal set of expectations for clergy — or any profession — is a very good thing.”

Although well-meaning, this new code of ethics will not change anything. It should go without saying that someone supposedly serving Christ will do their best to behave ethically and responsibly. The fact that it needs to be said is disturbing. Those who sign the pledge probably already abide by the standards. Those who want to parlay Christ's name into wealth, fame, and influence will not sign. Even if they sign, there are no consequences for ethical failure. The money changers have little to fear from toothless voluntary pledges.

The only consequence for stunting my mother's spiritual growth is that the money changers will not have her around to fleece. She finally stopped believing their lies. The trouble is that she is 80 and lost. Someone else will have to clean up the psychological mess they created.

Religious leaders have a long history of abusing their authority. In fact, the only people that sparked Jesus to verbal and physical aggression were the religious authorities of his day. And nothing has changed other than the media reach of modern technology is much, much greater and the rewards for false teachers are much, much greater.

The weather was nice enough to have the grill fired up this past weekend. As I waited for the coals to become white hot, I dug up the most recent inspirational book my mother received as a thank you gift.  I tore out each page and dropped it onto the glowing embers. Yes, I know I am supposed to love and forgive these televangelists. However, at that moment, I was having too much fun watching the pages burst into flame. Burn, baby, burn.